Awfully Defensive
by greyrooms
Summary: "The only thing that could annoy Jade the most and provide me with the instantaneous gratification of knowing that it was caused by my own hand would be to pretend like nothing happened." Post-TWC Bade silliness.


(of course I don't own anything blahblah)

**A/N:** I've tried to write emotional fic on like two separate occasions but it never works so then I just go back to writing really, really stupid stuff. Like this.

Blah, this is basically a huge wreck, since I feel like it's essential to clarify I think that kind of means I've failed as writer but I'm tired of working on this and I haven't published anything in a really long time. Basically, Beck is trolling Jade. I mean, that's practically one of his defining characteristics (other than Canadian and attractive) is that BECK IS A MASSIVE FREAKING TROLL. Especially when it comes to Jade. So he's basically teasing her. And they have, like, a LOT of eye sex. It's quite difficult to write about constant eye sex.

So anyway, he's trolling her, and they argue, and they just have fun with it because they're so comfortable around each other it would be weird if it were anything else. I don't know. I'm sure Beck is observant enough to understand if his presence was legitimately upsetting Jade but she just rolls with the punches here because they're borderline flirting and she likes it. That's what this is. (there's also a subtle Star Wars reference.)

Pre-fic rant over. Enjoy.

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><p>I'd probably be the last person to admit that after Jade and I broke up, I wasn't doing so well. Actually, I'd probably be second to last, since one would have to use torturous techniques on Jade to get her to say so.<p>

I haven't, of course, been rendered incapacitated, but I've sort of been coping by the possibly pathologically unhealthy belief that we'll get back together someday, and someday soon.

I still wear her necklace, and when I asked myself why I thought that I wanted to always keep her _hanging_ _around_. And then I had to laugh at myself because Jade wasn't around to slap me for telling a ridiculous joke.

I think it's the silliness that I miss the most. Fighting with her was nice and kissing her was even better, but there's nothing I miss more than the sound of her laughing when I tickled her or giving her noogies or her sticking her tongue out at me when she caught me looking at her while she did her hair or makeup in the mirror.

As a sort of gentle test of the waters, I said hey to her the first time I saw her after the breakup. Just to see how she'd respond. I stepped a little closer each day, and until I realized, if I wanted Jade to notice me I should just simply _dive in headfirst. _Get under her skin.

The only thing that could annoy Jade the most and provide me with the instantaneous gratification of knowing that it was caused by my own hand would be to pretend like nothing happened.

Or, at least, pretend the bitterness and yelling and unhappiness didn't happen.

_Act like we're best friends, _I thought to myself as I entered Sikowitz's classroom one morning.

Yes. _Act. Think of it like a play. _

Acting… that I can do. It seemed a bit less bizarre when I thought of it like that.

I found Jade, and immediately notice her hair tumbling over the back of the chair hung a few inches shorter, and the colored streaks have changed to a deep purple.

_That's something I would notice if we were still dating_, I thought, but quickly corrected myself. That's something a _friend _would notice, stay in character…

"G'morning," I say in a friendly tone, placing my hand on her head and ruffling her hair a bit. Her body tenses up as if going into attack mode, which I ignore. "You cut your hair." It's more a statement than a question, expecting the latter would grant me nothing but a cutting sarcastic blow in response.

I sit down next to her and she stares at me in a stunned silence, her eyes so wide I could see white all around her irises. She blinks a few times. Slowly, her eyebrows draw together at the middle as her jaw clenches.

"What is this, the freaking _Twilight Zone_?" she replies, crossing her arms.

I know how she works. I've thrown her off balance.

"Oh, hey, speaking of that, I watched your favorite yesterday… it's 'Night Call,' right?"

"Yeeeaaaahhhh…" she says slowly, eyes still wide with confusion.

I turn on the charm, look her in the eyes and the corners of my mouth turn up slowly, in a taunting smile I know that she hates the most.

She visibly loosens up, tries her best to hide her smile in return, and her face flushes. I just _love_ that I'm pulling her strings, and it's the first time I've seen her look anything other than depressed since we broke up. Then she stares down at the floor, purses her lips together until she frowns again.

"Will you stop looking at me like that?" she says, in a surprisingly gentle and almost childish tone as she looks back at me.

"Why?" I ask, not taking my eyes off her as I reach out and feel her new purple streak of hair.

_Holy crap, it's really soft. I wonder if her hair smells like lilacs or lavender or maybe grape, because Jade always matched her shampoo to the colour of her hair streaks, when they were blue she used an ocean breeze shampoo and when they were red her hair smelled like cherries and- _

"It makes me uncomfortable!" Jade's voice suddenly regains its boldness, startling me from my thoughts, and she brushes her hair back out of my grasp and glares at me.

Usually I'd leave her alone after that, but I'm playing a part here.

"You're awfully defensive today." I say with a raise of my eyebrows.

"I'm not being _defensive_, I just don't know what it is you're playing at!"

"Can't we just have a friendly chat for a minute before class!"

She smirks, "I'll take your minute, and raise you ten seconds."

Then she pauses when she realizes what she just said. _Ten seconds. _Her smug expression falters, she closes her eyes tight, takes a long, aggravated breath, and dismisses it.

Her face darkens again.

"It's okay, Jade." And I'm not trying to mess with her. I really do mean that.

"Stop it." She attempts to snap at me, but it sounds weak, like her heart isn't fully in it.

"…And what if I don't?" I reply, giving her another incredibly cocky smile and poking her ribs.

"Then I'll _castrate_ you." She swats at my hand and stifles laughs again, and if we were still dating I'd probably just give her noogies, but that seems to be crossing the line, so I just reply with a childish "You will _not_."

"Maybe not literally, but I will publicly emasculate you in such a way it will be a sort of symbolic castration."

"Oh, really? Try me."

Jade rolls her eyes so far back into her head I'm surprised she can still see, then projects her voice loudly to the entire room, "Beck Oliver cries during sex!"

"That was _one time_!"

_Why did I choose to do this again? I swear to god, she infuriates me so freaking much. _And that's when I figure if I couldn't charm the pants off of Jade (which I can do without acting, _thank you very much_) I'd turn the tables. I would do what I was second best at, which is, of course, bickering with her. Raising her blood pressure. She loves that.

"Anyone ever tell you that you're a pain in the ass?" is what I use as an instigator.

Her eyes flash with annoyance, "It's on my resume. Anyone ever tell you that you're stupid?"

"I think it goes without saying."

"And you have a dumb face."

"Well you've _kissed_ my dumb face, like, a hundred times!"

Her voice raises, "Well now I want to punch it!"

"Go ahead!"

"Don't tell me what to do!"

"Fine!"

"_Fine_!"

She sits there, scowling, and _god I just want to kiss her-_

And then Jade kicks me in the shin.

"Ow! What the hell! Ugh, fine, you win!"

"I win?" she sits up straighter and leans towards me in disbelief, "… I _win_! I didn't even know we were fighting!"

"Well, we are now!"

"Uh, no we're not, you just said that I won!"

"Are we really fighting about if we're fighting or not! Really?"

"No, we're not, because we're not fighting and I won!"

"Fine!"

"_Fine_!"

We sit there for a moment, huffing in anger and embarrassingly side-eyeing each other, when my glance meets hers and our eyes lock. She stops scowling and the corners of her lips turn up, forcing a genuine smile from me, too. She crinkles her nose and sticks her tongue out, and for a second everything seems to be like it used to.

"This was fun," she nervously admits just as Sikowitz enters the room in his usually spontaneous fashion.

"It _was_ fun. I, uhh… I missed this." I reply hesitatingly, and with a dash of courage and the fear of being kicked again, I put my arm around her and lean in close.

Jade slowly turns to look at me, her face only inches from mine, and scoffs.

"You _wish_," she says with a playful raise of her pierced eyebrow, and throws my arm off.

My fists clench. _So close. _But I suppose we'll get there eventually.

For the record, her hair does smell like grapes.

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><p>(This is a little bit what I imagine to be pre-canon bade to be like. Before they were 'exclusive.' Teasing and eye sex. Beck's such a troll.)<p>

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